Reduce the Stress? Yes, but how?

Photo Credit: TMC

Managing our energy and tension (self-regulation) can help us find the right amount of stress for optimal functioning. Don't forget that stress isn't all bad, but it requires close monitoring. We need to learn to recognize our own stress behaviour (when our limbic brain starts to run the show) and keep asking these two questions;

• Why? 
• Why now?

As simple as these two questions seem, they can take you on a wild ride! The benefits of Shanker's Self-Reg really begin to kick in when we reduce the stress (Step 3).  The five steps aren't linear; you'll find yourself jumping in at any point once you start wearing your Self-Reg goggles! 
I've had a wild ride this past year filled with stress in each of the five domains. But haven't we all?  The difference for me has been learning to apply the five steps to my life.  

Photo credit: originalpozer Self Reg Label added.

This is what I know now:

1. I can't unknow what I've learned.   I now view every aspect of my life through Self-Reg lenses.  It has helped me better understand myself and others.  My goal is to respond to the stress behaviour I see in myself and others using the steps of Self-Reg.
2. There is a stress epidemic in our world today.  As an educator, I have witnessed this first hand in my students, my staff and myself.  We need to change how we respond to stress behaviour, but we first need to recognize it in ourselves or face the health consequences of being caught in a stress cycle.
3. There is a tremendous amount of science behind Self-Reg that has helped me understand why it works, but also why it takes time to internalize.  The TMC Foundations courses have been a way for me to do that.
4. I know I'm thinking from a self-control viewpoint when I beat myself up for slipping into the Low Energy/High Tension quadrant of the Thayer Matrix.  I'm learning to understand that self-control is made possible by focusing on what comes first; self-regulation.
   

Don't be afraid or ashamed of the lower right quadrant of the Thayer Matrix! How else can we know when to take action towards optimal functioning? Paying attention to the changes in our energy level as it relates to our overall stress load will help us identify what stress we can reduce or maybe even eliminate.

What I've learned about Step 3:  Reduce the Stress?

1. It may happen naturally once you've begun to recognize your stressors.  For example, I've always had a bit of a commute to work.  I've noticed that listening to certain radio stations is very dysregulating for me.  I love music, but not the chatter that goes on between the radio announcers, the news, the weather, the ads etc.  My solution is to listen to the playlists on my phone.  I feel so much better after driving.  This past year, I decided to start using earbuds so I could listen to my tunes before doctor appointments and medical tests.  It made a big difference to my overall stress load!
2. Practice! Practice! Practice!  Try to make small reductions in stress, but do them routinely.  Small changes in bite size pieces will start to make a dent in reducing your stress load.  Another driving example: I've learned to do some shoulder/neck exercises (safely) while driving.  Just knowing I can get these stretches in and they will count towards my overall daily physio requirements has helped to reduce my stress!  This works for breathing exercises too.  My goal is to remember to pause and breathe when I help a student co-regulate, but I need to practice often so it comes automatically to me in the moment.
3. Co-regulation is powerful.  When I'm co-regulating with a student, sometimes it may mean doing nothing.  I'm doing nothing purposefully though!  I'm checking in with myself.  Red brains pick up signals from other red brains.  This is the time where all that breathing practice in my car can pay off.  I need to be able to think clearly and know my next steps with this child.  It will look a bit different each time, and that's what can be hard to describe to others. I'm also learning to pay attention to the times when others co-regulate me.  What is it that they do that helps me calm?  
4. Writing helps. This summer, I took time to make my own stress inventory, listing stressors in each of the five domains; biological, emotion, cognitive, social and prosocial. It became instantly clear which domains were draining my energy more than others.   That knowledge alone has helped me see ways I could reduce my overall stress load.  

I'm learning not to feel guilty about needing energy for those high tension times in my life.  Living a Self-Reg life is a process that never ends. That is exactly the point and exactly why it works.

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